Monday, February 28, 2011

EXPLOSIVE ENCOUNTER: TOP 1O COMMON JOKES WHEN YOU'RE SINGLE

TOP 10 TUESDAY
Starting today, every TUESDAY, pag-uusapan natin ang mga nakakaaliw na TOP 10. To start off, read on!

 TOP 10: TOP 10 BIRO NA MADALAS SABIHIN SA MGA TAONG SINGLE 

Sabi nila, magbiro ka na sa LASING, wag lang sa TAONG BAGONG GISING. I disagree, sa panahon ngayon na si PhilYoung Husband at Anne Curtis ang nagbibigay standard ng JOWA MATERIAL (pagdating sa pisikal) at dahilan kung bakit marami ang NAGPAPANTASYA sa kanilang DREAM MATE or PARTNER na nauuwi sa MATAGAL na PAGKA-SINGLE, dapat sigurong sabihin na, magbiro ka na sa LASING, wag lang sa SINGLE.

Sa pagkakataong ito, naglista ako ng TOP 10 na MADALAS AY “BIRO” or “JOKE” sa mga taong SINGLE (FOR THE LONGEST TIME). Bali baligtarin mo man ang mundo, ‘IT HURTS, YOU KNOW?!?”


  1. MAG-GYM KA KAYA!

Sa panahon ngayon na puros GYM ang bukambibig ng karamihan, madalas sabihan ang mga SINGLE na di makabingwit ng JOWA ay “MAG-GYM ka na.” Naniniwala ang karamihan na sa pamamagitan ng pagkakaroon ng magandang katawan, magkaka-jowa ka. Less taba, more ligaw. Less kain, bongga ang figure. Less carbs, more six packs. At maliban sa healthy lifestyle, more gym, more kalandian potential.

Sagot sa ganitong hirit," Naniniwala ako na magkaka-jowa rin ako. May mga tao pa ring MAHILIG sa STUFF TOY, BOLSTER at DATING HITSURA ni JUDY ANN!"

Sa mga lalake naman, " Wala yan sa pangangatawan. Minsan, nasa PERFORMANCE din naman."

  1. BAKA  MAGSARA NA YAN.

Madalas na binibiro ang mga babae na matagal nang single ng “Baka Magsara na yan” statement. Parang isang SHOP, pag walang suki, walang benta, soon, magsasara. Na para bang ang BOYFRIEND ay ang customer na maghahatid ng PUNLA (profit) at KALIGAYAHAN.

Sa mga pagkakataong ito, isa lang ang puede mong sabihin. “Kailanman ay hindi magsasara ito. Ngayo pa nga lang inaabangan na.” Magtataka ang kausap mo. Sabay hirit ka ng, “DAPAT MONG TANDAAN NA ANG MATALINONG MAMIMILI, SA SARIWA NAGPAPA-SUKI!”

Hindi applicable ang "Baka magsara na yan" statement sa mga lalake. Hangga't tumatayo si JUNIOR, nagaganap ang PAKIKIBAKA.

  1. MAY BALAK KA BANG MAG-PARI o MAG-MADRE?

Madalas din sabihin ng mga echosera’s echosero na “May balak ka bang mag-pari o mag-madre’ sa mga taong Single sa matagal na panahon. Sa paniniwala ng mga echosero’t echosera, kung si KRISTO nga ay bumigay kay MAGDALENA, paano pa ang simpleng MORTAL na gaya mo. Pasalamat ang mga echosera’t echosero, mapagtimpi ka. Kung hindi, KINULAM mo na sila.

Ang pangontra rito: Hindi ako magpa-pari o mag-ma-madre. Wala pa talagang nakaka-LEBEL sa pagiging DIYOS ko. Paaaaaaaaaak!

  1. NAPAGIIWANAN KA NA. RUN FORREST, RUN!

Maaaring busy ka sa pagpapayaman kaya di mo napansin ang iyong LOVE LIFE. Sa huli, nagka-edad ka, napagiwanan ka na. Mas nakakaasar pa dahil may mga echosera at echoserong ipinamumukha sa’yo na NAPAGIWANAN KA NA.  Tama bang kumanta ang mga KAIBIGAN MONG 30 PLUS years old na sa awiting ni Justin Bieber na “BEYBI” para ipamukha sa’yo na they are young, carefree and full of BEYBI?

Sa mga pagkakataong ito, isa lang ang nagagawa mo. Maghabol ng MRT. Maghabol ng Bus. Maghabol ng promotion. Para pag yumaman ka pa lalo, ipamumukha mo sa kanila. Zobel, Aquino, Ayala at Tan ang JOWA mo.

  1. BAKLA KA BA? TOMBOY?

Sa kulturang Pinoy or kahit saan naman, ang taong single sa matagal na panahon ay napagkakamalang BAKLA o TOMBOY. Kasi, ang basehan ng pagiging tunay na lalake at babae ay ang pagkakaroon ng JOWA; isang katotohanang nakaka-GAGA!

Isa lang naman ang sagot riyan eh. Eto: “ Katawan ko to, Isip ko to, Ari ko to. Wala kayong Pakiaalam kung para saan, kalian at paano ko gagamitin ito.” Tse! (Nalaman nila ang kasagutan base sa sagot mo!)

Kung ikaw naman ay babae, maari mong isagot, "Hindi lahat ng walang jowang babae ay Tomboy. May iba ring babae na BAKLA. Kaya tigilan ako!"

  1. WAG KANG CHOOSY KUNG DI KA NAMAN YUMMY.

Masakit man isipin, tila walang KARAPATAN sa MUNDO NG PAG-IBIG ang mga di YUMMY. YUMMY is equals to PhilYoung Husband and Anne Curtis look (di ako fan, sila lang ang sikat as of the moment). Pang-billboard. Artistahin. Ma-six pack. Ma-kurba. Kasi ang sabi ng karamihan, di daw totoo na makikita ng tao ang DEEP INSIDE mo. Siempre daw, unang tinitingnan ang KATAWAN. Yung harap, hindi yung looban.

Sa ganitong entra, isa lang ang maari mong isagot. Sabihin sa kausap: “HINDI LAHAT NG YUMMYing LALAKE ay MAY YUMMYing GIRLFRIEND. Yung iba, may YUMMYing BOYFRIEND din.”

"Hindi lahat ng YUMMYing BABAE ay PULIDO. Ang iba, may tendensiyang maging BLACK SWAN."

  1. TALO NG MALANDI ANG MAGANDA.

Para-paraan lang daw ang buhay pagdating sa pag-ibig. Sabi nga ay diskarte. Kaya ang iba, nabibiro nang Talo ng Malandi ang Maganda. Totoo nga siguro. Kasi ang malandi (na walang ganda) ay talagang agresibo, wild at all-around.

Isa lang ang maaari mong isagot. Sa panahong ng MALALANDI, hindi lang LALAKE o BABAE ang nakikilala nila. Minsan nakikilala rin nila sina AIDS, SYPHILLIS, at kung sino-sino pa.

  1. KUNG DI KAYANG DAANAN SA SANTONG DASALAN, BAKA KAY BELO, MASOLUSYUNAN!

Oo na. si Belo na ang simbolo ng pagpa-retoke sa Pilipinas. Sa kasamaang palad, ang mga single (na di masyadong nabiyayaan ng hitsura) ay nasasabihan ng kung anu-ano.

Sa mga ganitong pagkakataon, may mga buwelta na puede mong ipangtapat.

Mas mabuti pa rin ang NATURAL BEAUTY. Dapat tandaan na, HINDI LAHAT NG MAGANDA AY BABAE. KADALASAN, MAS MAGANDA SILA AT MAY LAWIT PA.

  1. ANG LALAKENG GIPIT, SA BADING KUMAKAPIT. GO, MARE!

Masakit isipin, hindi naman lahat ng SINGLE ay DESPERADA. Ang iba sa kanila, naghihintay. Nagdarasal. Kung ikaw ay babae at nasabihan ng “ANG LALAKENG GIPIT, SA BADING KUMAKAPIT,” dapat mong isipin ay kung ikaw ay BADING. Pangalawa, dapat mong isipin na PERA-PERA na lang ba ang labanan? MInsan, seks-seks din daw (arte lang!)

Kung masabihan man ng ganitong pananalita, maari mong sabihin na: “ HINDI LAHAT NG LALAKENG GIPIT AY SA BADING KUMAKAPIT. MINSAN, PATI SA 5/6, SUGAR MOMMY AT KAHIT SA KLOSETANG POLITIKO NAGPAPAGAMIT!”

  1. AANHIN MO ANG GABI KUNG WALANG KATABI.

Isa lang ang sagot sa banat na “Aanhin mo ang gabi kung wala kang katabi.” Eto:  AANHIN MO ANG KATABI KUNG WALA NAMANG SILBI.

To all SINGLES out there, HAPPY INDEPENDENCE DAY.

BOTTOM LINE, matutong MAGHINTAY at MAPANGKILATIS. 

 

Sunday, February 27, 2011

EXPLOSIVE ENCOUNTER: TOUGHEST PLACE TO BE!

BREAKING NEWS:

As I opened my Facebook Account, I saw a series of video posts from my bestfriend Apes. The video is the BBC Series "Toughest Place to be." It features how London Bus Driver Josh West heads to Manila and tries to be Jeepney Driver.  West stays with Rogelio Castro and the family.

 Let's all watch!


VIDEO 1



VIDEO 2



VIDEO 3



VIDEO 4



VIDEO 5



VIDEO 6

EXPLOSIVE ENCOUNTER: I AM NUMBER FOUR!

MOVIE MONDAY!
Every Monday, I will showing a review of the movie (s) that I recently watched. Read at your own risk for THIS IS NOT YOUR TYPICAL MOVIE REVIEW.


In HOKUS POKUS: I AM NUMBER FOUR

Over the weekend, I was able to watch two movies; one foreign and one local. Dahil may budget ako (hindi rin), I went out with my friend to watch the movie “I am number four.” Then on Sunday, habang ngumangasab ako ng One Dollar Meal at Kutsinta for lunch, I rolled out the movie “Shake, Rattel and Roll 10.”

Unahin natin ang “I am Number Four.” Base sa pagbabasa ko, ang sci-fi movie ay isa palang nobela na isinulat nina Pittacus Lore, and pen name nina James Frey at Jobie Hughes. Ang aklat ay nailimbag (sa mga pa-sushal at yuppie, ang LIMBAG at PUBLISH, hindi LIBAG) ng Harper Collins noong August 3, 2010. Ang nobela ay ililimbag (again, publish) sa anim na installation.

Tulala ako sa panonood ng pelikula. Hindi dahil mangha (sa mga yuppie at pa-sushal, MANGHA means AMAZE) ako sa mga special effect o kung anu-ano pang pasiklab. Tulala ako dahil parang hindi ko matimpla ang pelikula. Una, siguro nga ay hindi ko kilala ang mga artista. Na sa huli, na-figure out ko na lang na ang bidang lalake ay isa sa mga karakter sa Smallville (tama ba?). Siempre, ang bidang babae, nakilala ko. Isa siya sa mga tauhan sa sikat na GLEE. Samantalang ang iba, di ko kilala at di ko na balak kilalanin pa.

Simple at walang bago ang plot. The kontrabidad attacks the bida. Patayan. Blood. Attack the city. Big confrontation. Sabog. Bang. Kaboom. Ganon. Wakas. At siempre, uso rin ang pakitang katawan ng mga artista. Si bidang lalake, parang din a hitsurang highschool senior. Si bidang babae naman, umaastang artsy na manang. Hindi ko rin maintindihan kung naka-shoulder pads ang bidang babae.

Napanuod ko ang pelikula in 2D (puedeng mag-boo ang mga yuppie at 3D-4D fanatics). Maliban sa matingkad na blue na madalas lumabas sa palad ng bida, ang mga pagsabog sa pelikula ang nagbigay estetika (sa mga yuppie at pa-sushal, ESTETIKA is AESTHETICS), sa ilang bahagi ng eksena. Di nawala ang habulan. Basagan ng face. Oo, face-to-face. At yon na nga, tila mukhang ALBINO na naman ang ginamit na image ng kontrabida. Tanong, ano bang meron sa mga ALBINO at lagi silang ginagamit na imahe ng kotrabida o mga ALIEN. In reference to the ALBINO Factor, pansinin ang pelikulang HARRY POTTER o ang mga pelikulang may SAPI/DEMONYO factor. Anong meron?

Sa huli, laging huli at dapat sa huli, nagwagi ang kabutihan laban sa kasamaan. Aba, di lang pala may NUMBER FOUR, may NUMBER ____ din. At hahanapin pa ang ibang numero. Sumatutal (Para sa mga yuppie at pa-sushal, SUMATOTAL is IN TOTAL), ang pelikulang “I am Number Four” ay parang (sa pananaw ko) ay isang pelikulang sana ay naisatelebisyon na lang. Sa kabila ng suguran, duguan at habulan, walang SIPA or KICK ang pelikula. May SIPA pala. Pagiisipin ka nang mga sumusunod: Nasaan si Number ____? Sino ang artistang gumanap na Number 6?

Ilang tip sa mga manunuod ng pelikulang “I am Number Four.”

1. Kung ikaw ay KABIT, wag tangkaing panoorin ang pelikula. Pag nahuli ka ng asawa ng kinakalantari mo at bigla kang tinanong nang “Anong ibig sabihin nito?” Baka masabi mong na “I am Number Four.” Patay, eh di napa-amin ka.

2. Kung ikaw ay walang pasensya sa pila sa sinehan, wag na ring manuod ng pelikulang ito. Baka maasar ka lang dahil kahit ang numero mo ay ONE, di ka matatawag. Ano ba kasi ang TITLE ng PELIKULA? I am Number Four.

3. Kung nag-a-abang ng PANALO sa LOTTO at may HISTORY ng HIGHBLOOD, wag na ring manuod ng pelikulang ito. Baka kakahintay mo ng resulta, may biglang mag-aanounce ng “Sino ang Number Four” sa mga nakapanuod na, magpanic at mahimatay ka. Bakit? Inakala mong nanalo ka dahil ikaw ay number four!

4. Kung ikaw ay naghihintay ng Order at napatambay malapit sa sinehan, wag ASSUMING. Di palibhasa na tinawag ang salitang NUMBER FOUR, handa na ang inorder mo.

Yan ay mga simpleng TIP sa mga manunuod ng I am Number Four.

IN HOKUS POKUS: SHAKE, RATTLE AND ROLL 12
  
Fan ako ng pelikulang Pilipino; hindi dahil sa mga artista (umamin na kasi!!!!) kundi dahil sa mga KAGAGAHAN sa plot. Oo, mga kagagahan, kaguluhan at kalokohan dala ng komersyalismo (insert, FILM THEORY. Sa mga yuppie at pa-sushal, baka ma-nose bleed kayo, so BACK OFF. Arte lang).

Nitong Linggo, napanuod ko na ang much-awaited movie of year 2010 (arte lang). Much-awaited for Brunei dahil hindi pinapalabas ang pelikulang Pinoy dito. Kung nakakapasok man, puros pirata pa. At halos buwan ang bibilangin bago dumating dito ang pelikulang ipinalabas sa Pilipinas. Kaya, MUCH-AWAITED.

So anong meron sa Shake, Rattle and Roll 12? May kaugnayan ba ito sa awiting Shembot? Alamin natin.

Nahahati sa tatlong serye ang Shake, Rattle and Roll. Kung hindi ito hinati sa tatlo, balewala ang silbi ng pelikula. Ano pa’t tinawag itong Shake, Rattle and Roll. Kahit kailan man, di mababago ang ORDER ng Shake, Rattle and Roll. Never naman itong naging Roll, Shake, Rattle or di kaya ay Rattle, Roll and Shake. Maguguluhan daw si Aling Tasing (sa mga yuppie and pa-sushal, si ALING TASING ang simbolo ng masang Pinoy sa mga pananaw ng producer. Si ALING TASING ay si LILIA CUNTAPAY- arte lang).
Lilia Cuntapay in her MOST FAB pic!
 Maganda at Luma ang bersyon ng SRR (I-short cut natin para KEWL) ngayong taon. Maganda dahil nagsasama sama ang mga engkanto at bampira. Ang tila wala lang sa lugar at palasak na (Para sa mga yuppie at pa-sushal, PALASAK si CLICHÉ) ay ang MAMA-NIKA. Maliban sa nakakairitang pagtawag sa ‘DOLL,’ mas nakakagulo ng pagkatao ang CHAKA DOLL moment. Sa totoo lang, ilang beses ko ng nakita ang ganitong klaseng KALOKOHAN.

Pero wag ka, halos hindi ko maalis ang mata ko sa telebisyon lalo na sa ROLL part. Napa-roll talaga ako sa twist; si Teacher Dianne ay nakain din sa huli. Samantala, naaliw ako kay John Lapus. Umaastang Carribean ang pananamit, at mas umaastang LALAKE sa kilos. As usual, isa na naman itong ELEMENTO sa Pelikulang Pinoy – naghahalo ang katatakutan at katatawanan. Isa itong, KALOKOHAN.

Kung ikukumpara sa mga nagdaang ROLL, RATTLE at SHAKE (gusto ko lang maiba ang order), walang ipinagbago ang RATTLE, SHAKE at ROLL (arte lang). Nanakot ito. Nagpapatawa. Nagpapahiwatig ng lagim at kababalghan. At sa huli, kumikita si Mother Lily.

Ano ang kaugnayan ng SHAKE, RATTLE and ROLL sa awiting Shembot? Si Mother Lily. Siguradong napa-SHEMBOT sa blockbuster hit ng SHAKE, RATTLE and ROLL. Ikaw ba naman ang may BONGGANG BONGGANG bahay bakasyunan sa Tagaytay!

Ano ang namimiss ko sa marketing hype ng pelikulang Pilipino?

  1. Na-mi-miss ko ang mga teaser na nagpapakita ng mga NAGSISIKSIKANG manunuod sa premiere night ng pelikula.
  2. Na-mi-miss ko ang (sa mata ng Yuppie at pa-sushal) jologs na nagsasabi, ‘Grabe ang ganda ng pelikula” sabay sigaw, at yung mga artistang puno ng kashowbizan sa pagsabi ng “The movie was great.” (point lang naman nung artista eh sumipsip sa producer para magawan din sila ng pelikula, eventually)
  3. Na-mi-miss ko ang katahimikan at ingay sa loob ng sinehang Pinoy. Banas ako kasi sa mga maingay, yung nagkukuwento habang rumorolyo ang pelikula.
  4. Na-mi-miss ko ang pila sa sinehang Pinoy. Nakakatawa kasi pagmasdan ang ibang manunuod; akala mo mag-a-outing sa nipis at iksi ng damit.
  5. Na-mi-miss ko ang mga BANIDOSONG manunuod. Umaasa silang ma-discover sa dilim ng sinehan.
  6. Na-mi-miss ko ang katanungang, bakit ang dami namang bakanteng upuan, ang ibang nanunuod, gusto, nakatayo!

 

 

EXPLOSIVE ENCOUNTER: A COFFEE TABLE BOOK - FOR FREE!

Last year, I joined the Brunei Times Essay Competition. The theme was about "Brunei Darussalam and the Challenges of Globalisation." As  graduate student of UP Open University, I braved myself and wrote my piece.

Apparently, I didn't win the highest place. However, if there's anything that I'm proud of my decision in joining, that is writing a masterpiece about globalisation, aside from bringing home some interesting prizes like a mug, a car shade, an eco bag, and a coffee table book which is loaded with pictures about Brunei. Today, I am sharing you some of the pages of the memorabilia. 



The Pages of the Coffee Table Book.

















Plus, I am sharing with you my composition. Read on.

The Big Leap: Brunei Darussalam in the midst of Globalisation
By Earvin Charles B. Cabalquinto
In the Human Development Report published by the United Nations Development Programme in 2009, Brunei ranked 30th out of the 178 countries. Between 1980 and 2007, the Sultanate’s Human Development Index (HDI) rose by 0.39 per cent annually from 0.827 to 0.920. Furthermore, Brunei has also the highest Gross Domestic Product per capita at USD50,200. Given the history of Brunei’s competitive and impressive performance, is the country equipped and prepared for the onset of globalisation’s challenges?


Globalisation is at our times, an era of prosperity and innovation. With the expansion of international trade, massive financial flows and the boom of communication technology, there is a trend of cross-border movement of people, money, ideas, and technology. This leads to the interdependence of nations, the creation of a global village. However, individual countries across the globe are influenced and changed by globalisation at different levels.


Being the 4th largest oil producer in ASEAN and the 9th largest exporter of LNG in the world, Brunei has a wealth of oil and gas resources that boost its economy and positions it as a major player in the global market. However, with intense competition worldwide brought about by globalisation, rich natural resources are not the sole key factor in creating a responsive economy, but human capital as well. Education and Basic Health care aligned with a secure environment in the micro and macro level are vital criteria.


Globalisation has a new character, a shift in the structure and system of how nations interplay. It creates new markets of globally linked businesses, new policies or rules, and new tools of communication. Positively, Brunei addresses the impacts of globalisation with a strong vision and strategic plans that make opportunities squarely accessible to its people and to foreigners as well. This is articulated in Brunei Economic Development Board’s (BEDB) Vision 2035.


The deepening of integrated global market is one of globalisation’s resounding impacts. All nations are challenged with the heightened demands of international markets through diversification. Brunei Darussalam prioritizes industrial, infrastructure and urban development to suffice the fast-changing economic landscape and be an investment destination. Moreover, policies and programs that cultivate and protect local small and medium enterprises (SMEs) shall be taken in the host of sustainable business initiatives. The Opportunity Centre and Buy Brunei portal are idyllic business strategies that may keep the country recognized among its neighboring countries.


Halal products in the flow of international goods are at stake in the advent of globalisation. There is an influx of big brands that may give opportunities to participating nations, or possible threats to small businesses or religious practices. In Brunei, Halal and non-Halal classifications should be intensified through processing, certification and manufacturing as invested by Brunei Government. Such commitment may set Brunei as an epitome of a Malay Islamic Monarchy that prides on the standards of Halal products.


Moving in a borderless world, globalisation utilizes connectivity through technology in communication. Knowledge on information is an essential foundation of future citizens. To ensure this, Brunei may further develop and fund its ICT initiatives such as the iCentre, the first Info-Communication Technology incubator in Brunei, and the Knowledge Hub, a Research and Development centre. This may create more opportunities to foster a nation of competitive ICT literate individuals. In the process, to protect inventions and products, Intellectual property rights shall be reviewed and be planted with stricter policies.


A changing climate and environmental degradation brought about by globalisation’s industrial impacts may affect Brunei. However, through alliance building among private and business partners, well-thought and well-funded programmes that aim to develop a sustainable and healthy environment may bring Brunei at the forefront of secure and sustainable habitat. An exploration of alternative energies designed in dynamic environmental programmes as initiated in the Sultanate propels abundance and stability in the long-term.


A fluid tourism is bolstered by globalisation. Nations are challenged to integrate preserved cultural richness in an international and modern flavour. As a participant in the global tourism landscape, Brunei may harness its ecotourism groundwork to increase awareness on a stretch of environmental degradation issues from a local to global platforms. Relatively, in support of an active tourism, a flexible aviation by Royal Brunei Airlines may route foreigners in the Sultanate toward enjoying a comfortable and luscious travel experience.


Globalisation is here to stay and progresses in time. However, despite the challenges, strategic plans, transparent policies and consistent actions may address the phenomenon in a controllable and progressive phase. Appropriate economic and social policies are needed to manage and equally distribute global opportunities to local scene as well. Nevertheless, a tough alliance between stakeholders ranging from the government up to the citizens is the key toward achieving survival and sustainability in this complex and multifaceted era of globalisation.

Friday, February 25, 2011

EXPLOSIVE ENCOUNTER: POST-SEM SYNDROME!

Hindi ko alam kung ako lang ang nakakaramdam ng Post-Sem Syndrome, o meron pa bang iba dyan? Pakitaas lamang ang kanang kamay! (Pati si JUNIOR, tumayo at sumangayon! - YUCK!)

Okay, pauso lang ang konsepto ng Post-Sem syndrome. Ayon sa AKING depinisyon, ang Post-Sem Syndrome ay isang uri ng emosyonal na pagkabalisa na hatid ng pagtatapos ng semester. Madalas, ang simtomas nito ay ang ang pakiramdam ng paghahanap ng gawaing pang-eskuwela gayong tapos na ang klase. Madalas, ang Post-Sem Syndrome ay isang emosyonal na kalagayan. Ang mga taong nakakararanas nito ay mga estudyanteng nagsipag o nalunod sa gawaing pang-eskuwela at sa isang iglap ay mababakante. Ibig sabihin, wala ng isusumiteng asignature o papel pero naghahanap ng mga gawaing pang-eskuwela.

Ang Post-Sem Syndrome ay parang Post-Natal Blues sa mga buntis - Pauso ko ulit. Maaring dahil sa hatid na trauma ng school work at deadlines, maaaring nasusuya ang isang tao sa gawaing pang-eskuwela o kaya ay naghahanap pa ng gawaing pang-eskuwela (MASOKISTA?).

Tandaan, normal ang pakiramdam ng Post-Sem Syndrome - Pauso ko ulit. Maaaring ito ay maging tanda ng "EXCELLENCE" dahil tapos na ang sem, naghahanap ka pa ng school work. Gayunpaman, isa mga malubhang kaso nito (pauso ko) ay ang pagbubuklat ng mga AKLAT o paggawa ng 'IMAGINED' assignments  (pauso ulit).

Ngayon, ramdam na ramdam ko ang Post-Sem Syndrome. Gayunpaman, nagpapasalamat ako at malaya na ako sa school work. Saka ko na iisipin ulit ang mga gabing walang tulugan o pamorningan sa piling ng aking laptop.

Hello Sem Break. Hello Summer. Hello Social Life.

Para labanan ang Post-Sem Syndrome, heto ang sampung pamamaraan:

1. Halukayin ang baul at basahin ang mga napagiwanang NOBELA. Muling kiligin, tumawa o matakot. Siguraduhin lang na hindi related sa eskuwela ang babasahin para ma-RELAK. Oo, ma-RELAK (to follow: SSSSSSSS = MARELAKSSSSSS)!

2. Bisitahin ang MALL. Baka namiss mo ang mag-SHOPPING. Baka namiss mo magpaka-YUPPIE kahit sinlaki ng PUPPY ang budget mo.

3. Magparamdam sa mga kaibigan. Sabihin mo sa kanila, "I'm alive, san tayo?"Wag magtaka kung hindi ka nila pansinin. Siguro'y di ka nila nakilala. Paano ba naman, tinalo mo pa ang ERMITANYO o TAONG GRASA sa pagka-haggard ng look mo sa nagdaang semestre.

4. Mag-Facebook 24/7 kahit dati mo nang gawain.This time, wala nang sagabal. Maliban na lang kung naputulan kayo ng ilaw dahil di pa kayo nakakabayad.

5. Umibig, Umibig, Umibig. Kung nawalan ka ng love life during the sem, ito na ang panahon para muling buhayin ang ATHENA o ADONIS sa iyong pagkatao. Puede mo ring i-SMS si Kupido kung tila tinalikuran ka na nito. Subukin mo rin makipag-DATE.

6. Maghanap ng Summer Activities. Puede kang mag-swimming lesson, photography o kahit mag-aral sumayaw. Kung gusto mo, puede ka ring sumali sa MILO summer camp kung namiss mo ito simula pagkabata. Malay mo, maging COACH ka pa dahil sa LAKI mo.

7. Travel. Ito na ang perpek timing para libutin mo ang Pilipinas. Di ka na busy. At siempre, kung may budget ka, lipad na sa iba pang panig ng daigdig. Abangan mo rin ang SEAT SALE ng CP. Malay mo, sa susunod, di lang SEAT SALE ang makuha mo, IKAW na ang EROPLANO.

8. Magpapayat. Oo. Kailangan mo nang magpapayat. Paparating na ang summer at dapat ng iwaksi ang FATS na hatid ng STRESS from school.

9. Kung ikaw ay taga-OU at DevComm Major, aba, di mo dapat palampasin ang GKK (Grand Kita Kits) sa Abril.

10. Magpasalamat. Ngayong tapos na ang semestre, nararapat lamang na magpasalamat ka sa mga taong sumuporta sa'yo at sa Diyos.

...Kung hindi dahil sa mga KAPATID mo, hindi ka makikipag-agawan sa paggamit ng Internet or laptop. 

... Kung hindi dahil sa KAPITBAHAY mo, hindi ka magsusumikap na tapusin na ang iyong pagaaral para makapagtapos ka na o ma-promote sa trabaho para MAKALIPAT ng NEIGHBORHOOD. Paano ba naman, nakakasawa na rin ang AWAYAN at VIDEOKE ng KAPITBAHAY!

... Kung hindi dahil sa magulang mo, hindi ka mabubungangaan sa pagkaburara mo o pag-cram. At kung hindi dahil sa MAGULANG mo, di ka magsusumikap sa pagaaral para makuha ang LATEST GADGET para sa iyong GRADUATION.

...At kung hindi dahil sa mga KAIBIGAN mo, hindi ka maiingit at maasar dahil lagi kang iwan sa lakad at gimik dahil nagtatapos ka ng paper. Dahil dyan, nanaiisin mong tapusin na ang mga gawaing pang-eskuwela. Sana lang, hindi kalidad ng INSTANT NOODLES ang naipasa mo sa mga Propesor mo.

...Kung hindi dahil sa Diyos, hindi ka mapagmimilagruhan kung naging tamad ka ilang araw bago ang exam. At dahil sa Diyos, heto ka't BUHAY at nasa TAMANG PAG-IISIP.

O paano, Happy Sem Break!

EXPLOSIVE ENCOUNTER: TRUCK OF HAPPINESS!

Have you seen the latest MOBILE strategy of Coca-Cola? Well, if you haven't, you better watch the video and see how the global leader in beverage drink has made a viral marketing strategy in the Philippines.

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

EXPLOSIVE ENCOUNTER: PINOY HORROR MOVIES

As of writing, I am playing the movie “Dalaw” in my background. Actually, I already watched this horror flick last Sunday. It’s just that I want to re-run it again and scare myself. Yes, at this time of the month that I should be scared to beat all the deadlines from graduate school, I am even frightening myself with movies that I wish to awaken my lazy and sleepy senses.

I’ve always been a fan of Pinoy horror flicks. I find our fright fest a combination of “kakornihan” and clichés. However, despite the predictability of the plot and the in-your-face spooky scenes, I adore our own katatakutan. Interestingly, the stories and plots are intertwined with our beliefs and religious system. Today, I will share to you the TOP 10 Trademark of Filipino Horror Flicks.


1. White Lady. Even before Sadako crawled into the limelight, Filipino Flicks are known for a ghoulish girl who wears a white long dress lurking around town. At times, this lady has a long hair, floats and usually crosses the road to distract a driver who passes by in a dark and eerie street. End up, that driver will get into an accident. Of course, who would forget the movie “Ang Babae sa Balete Drive.” While Zsa Zsa Padilla who changed into Mary Walter is just convincing to portray the white lady. In most stories, a flashback is presented to justify the white lady’s mysterious death. Normally, it is associated with a woman who is raped and is thrown in some abandoned land, or a girl was abandoned on the day of her wedding and opted to commit suicide and soon ran for revenge.

 
2. Haunted House and Barkada. A traditional horror flick, especially Regal Films produced, won’t be complete without a complete roll of fright fest in a haunted house. In most occasions, a group of teens would lose track in their way, get a flat tire and will find a house in the middle of the night. Without an option, the group would stay in a haunted house, and yes, experience a haunting command. On top of these, the haunting experience doesn’t scare you at all because you are simply distracted with the “love team” and the funny antics by either a gay persona in the group, a sosyalera, a superstitious yaya, and an old confused driver who must (in the first place) should bring and know all the tools to fix the car.



3. The Kasambahay. Vacations are well loved by Filipinos. Mostly in films, this is portrayed as part of the plot in horror movies. Normally, the setting is shot in a province or some far rural place where there’s no access to mobility like phones, etc. Perhaps, Filipino movies have a tradition in showing the “unexplained” and “ghoulish” experiences happen in a rural setting where there’s a high concentration of superstitious beliefs. Apart from the vacation escapade turned into a nightmare, what spices up the plot is the presence of a weird kasambahay. In most movies, that person dresses oddly, has physical deformities, mumbles, and suddenly appears in the middle of the night and does some prayer or ritual. With the Urban based and modern bakasyonista seeing the kasambahay’s practices, the play of horrifying imagination begins.

 
4. Manananggal. For a time, the manananggal has been part of the Filipino pop and real culture. During the 90s, the manananggal was considered an icon in some horrow flicks. If I’m not mistaken, Alma Moreno played a role. The concept of the manananggal, normally a girl whose upper body separates from the lower part and turns into a big scary bat-inspired entity, has evolved in Philippine provinces. True or not, the story about the manananggal may not only represent stories that evolve in towns, but is also used in the urban setting to scare those children who doesn’t want to sleep at night and are hard-headed. As I remember, our housemaid before would even say to me that the manananggal would come and get me if I don’t sleep. Too bad or thank God, I haven’t see a manananggal except in the corporate and modern jungle.


5. Zombies. Even before Plants vs. Zombies or the gore fest shines in American horror movies, we have been “smitten” by the presence of zombies in our movies. Then again, instead of getting that scare, we always end up with looking at the substandard production design of the zombie’s look. Yes, even us can do their make-up and move slow with a hunch back to become a convincing zombie.



6. Dwende/ Dwarf. Part of any early Filipino horror movies is the presence of those fashionable dwarves or dwende. If I’m not mistaken, the concept of the dwende is an extension of Philippine superstitious beliefs which originates in rural areas or provinces. Interestingly, the dwende is portrayed as a whimsical being that shares good and sometimes bad magic to others. These dwarves wear a colorful dress, pointed shoes and hats. Plus, their ears are pointed as well. But hey, I do believe in their powers to hurt those will destroy their house; in our cultural beliefs, their oasis is designed like a small mountain of soil leaning over a tree. In one incident, my brother got these bruises after playing near a tree with the pile of mud. Thankfully, after a ritual was made, my brother recovered. We just then discovered that my brother might had hit the house of the dwarves.



7. Vampira. The vampires are the fast moving versions of lethargic zombies. And in Philippine horrow movies, I am convinced that vampires are magnificent characters that give us enough scare especially when we were kids. Who wouldn’t remember Maricel Soriano who once took a role of a vampire. With all the deep and demonic voice paired with a face of terror, vampires open the door for further imagining an eerie encounter with a tragic death.



8. Mangkukulam/ Witch. Witches have always been a signature character in Philippine horror movies. They do not only possess that mysterious and deep set eyes, they also find comfort in a room filled with candles, a rag doll, bunch of pins, and an indescribable altar. To extend their imagery, witches in Philippine movies get a hair, a picture or any material owned by the person they hate or despise, to deliver a curse. Soon, they utter the “Latin phrases” and the curse takes effect. In my opinion, the revenge inflicted by the witches to mortals articulate great and terrifying powers.


9. Exorcism. Exorcism has been part of Filipino cultural beliefs. They originate in, again, provinces. Through out the years, exorcism has been central in Filipino horror flicks. While there are a lot of portrayals about it, I am more scared seeing a child who is possessed with a bad spirit. These possessed kids do not only appear in doors, windows, hallways, they also stare at you with some bloody eyes and wild aura. Plus, they talk like an adult and do beastly responses. They push you away and even throw a heavy cabinet. To solve this, a priest will be called. During the battle, the rosary and the bible will flew out. Soon, the holy water shall restore the child’s innocence.


10. Comedy. Some Filipino horror films won’t be a stand out without the presence of witty and corny lines delivered by exaggerated characters. I guess, this is more terrifying to see than letting the real horror unfold. Why? Because comedic parts destroy the flow of what could possibly be a successful terrorizing scene. Imagine, you don’t only get to jump out of your seat as you watch the flick, you also fall out of place with all the funny banters. But then again, relating to our culture, our understanding of reality is an amalgamation of genres, just like in movies; we laugh and we cry; we play with our emotions. And this reality is captured by movies which lead to the definition of what is really scary, something that is a blockbuster in the eyes of the producers, and plays safe by mixing different genres in order to rake in profit.

Friday, February 18, 2011

EXPLOSIVE ENCOUNTER: PACQUAIO'S SECRET, REVEALED!

Finally, the secret of World Boxing Champion Manny "Pacman" Pacquiao is revealed! Watch, now na!

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

EXPLOSIVE ENCOUNTER: A PRACTICAL PINOY'S NEWEST SHOPPING BESTFRIEND!

After lunch, I tweeted in my twitter account that I was wondering what are the newest restaurants in the Philippines that are a must-try. Being in Brunei for more than two years now, I definitely deserve to taste a new set of appetizing treats for myself when I get back to the Philippines this April.

My dear friend Brian replied. He was suggesting to check out Makati, Ayala Triangle. As soon as I got his tweet, I jotted down in my notebook the name of the restaurant he suggested.

Surprisingly, my other dear friend Thirdy suggested something. He tweeted not a list of restaurants but some strange websites, which he asked me to check out. In his tweet, he recommended Ensogo, CashCash Pinoy and Buyanihan. Honestly, I'm not familiar with the websites he's referring.

But of course, there's no harm in checking out the website. And so, I clicked.

And gaaaaaaawd! I was so happy to realize that the websites he tweeted are budget-friendly sites that offer the best and cheapest deals in the Philippines. And I mean jaw-dropping and half-the-prize promotions ranging from food, fashion, and even travel! Actually, some offers were like up to 70% off!


Cash Cash Pinoy: CLICK

 BUYanihan: CLICK




ENSOGO: CLICK


As I browsed through, I also read some reviews about these sites. Apart from the good reviews on customer and merchants participation, the innovative online strategy provides a practical guide to practical and thrifty Pinoys. While you may overwhelmed with the lowest price offered, the quality of the products are assured at its best. And because most people go online, most merchants benefits from a large number of consumers through reservations, which is definitely more compared to traditional walk-ins.

Although I haven't tried purchasing any deals in these sites, my friend told me that he already availed some promotions before and he was just happy. He used his Paypal account and it was soooo convenient, fast and secure.
The payment scheme!

Buying deals in these websites is as simple as any Online purchase procedures. In these sites, you have to sign-up. After, you can check on the deals. If you like it, you click the buy button. Eventually, you'll be asked on your payment - credit card, paypal, etc. Then, you will receive your electronic voucher, which you will present on the merchant/outlet of the deal. Isn't it a breeze?


What's hot? Travel for 4 to Boracay with round-trip Airfare via Cebu Pacific Air (Manila-Kalibo-Manila) and 3D/2N accommodation at La Carmella de Boracay Resort Hotel with Daily Breakfast for 4! Travel period is from March 1, 2010 until September 30, 2012. Total price is 6,667/pax compared to the original price of 12,500/pax!

So what are you waiting for? check it at BUYanihan, now!



Happy Shopping!

PS: This is not a paid advertising. The blogger would just want to share the websites.

Sunday, February 6, 2011

EXPLOSIVE ENCOUNTER: BUSY PIG ON CHINESE NEW YEAR!

As you all know, the world celebrated Chinese New Year for the past days. Yes, we all welcomed the year of the Rabbit in the Chinese Lunar Calendar. Since my bosses are Chinese, we had the luxury to enjoy a two-day-and-a-half vacation. Including Sunday, I enjoyed a three-day-and-a-half vacation.


This is one of the unusual Chinese New Year Holiday I had. The celebration moved so fast, and at most, it was raining heavy at night in Brunei. On top of that, I didn't get to go to any Open House. Actually, I got one invitation from our boss. Apparently, the invitation was so sudden that I had to decline because of the tons of school work I was finishing when he called. 

Despite the bad and uncooperative weather, the celebration capped off with left and right fireworks display! Seated in my room, I was mesmerized with the explosion of bright colours in admirable shapes and sizes. Honestly, Chinese New Year celebration in Brunei is louder than the Worldwide New Year event.

Holidays during Chinese New Year celebration is in a way, money saving. Why? Oh well. Most of the shops were closed during the Chinese New Year celebration. With that, I'm left with a choice to leave my expenses in control. And in my case, since I'm trapped in Brunei, I had no option but to simply embark on absolute hibernation in my room.
Despite the hibernation, I was productive during the holidays. I didn't only get to transcribe some past interviews for my school paper and read some related studies, I also had the privilege to unwind.  My holiday was packed with endless DVD Marathons, a swimming session, some pre-testing of a talk TV show in my blog which I hope to launch very soon, read a book, and what else, lots of food tripping that I almost puked.

Yes, you heard me right. My holiday was full of appetizing treats that almost tripled the size of my ballooning waste line. On top of that, because it was so nice to sleep in rainy mornings, I got off track from my Taichi routine and simply let loose to cuddle some pillows and spend more hours in Neverland.

For the holidays, I watched Love and Other Drugs, The Tourist, You again, and Ika-sampu, a Filipino horror movie. With some chips, pasta and drinks, I watched Ika-Sampu with Cecil and Troy in the staff house. With these four, only three passed my taste.

Obviously, the Filipino horror flicked didn't make it. I just find the story half-baked; the editing is messy as it didn't show the differentiation between the flashback and the present; the lead actress was like an 80's actress brought to life; some actresses are OA; scripting is terribly cliche; and a lot more of horrible scenes that I felt my dollar spent was not worthy. Bottom line, should I rate 'Ika-sampu," it will definitely be thumbs down, even, negative.

I liked Love and Other Drugs. As I was saying to my officemate, extracting the "Pfizer" subtext, the film was rousing and artistically made. Despite the many steamy sex scenes and nudity, the film lived to its beauty of portraying real love - something that is caring, forever, mending, and addictive.









The Tourist made me laugh. Angelina Jolie's character and Johnny Depp's acting matched perfectly. Actually, I was expecting more heart-stopping chase scenes in this flick. Surprisingly, the tranquility and sweetness of the plot made it more appealing. Plus, the humor Johnny Depp's character encompassed awkwardness and seriousness. The Tourist gives a light approach on the complicated cases of stolen money, bad guys, and masked identities.
You Again is one of those movies I like to watch and not think at all as the plot unfolds. It was very straightforward and again, humorous. Surprisingly, You again somewhat presents real life. There are some people who just ruined our supposedly happy highschool life, and unfortunately, we meet them again in the most unexpected places or event in our life. Well, I didn't have such experience. But seeing the film made me realize how life can totally make a full twist from highschool to making a career, a married life and even in old age. While history can repeats itself, you can always rewrite everything.

Over the past days, I also got to watch Desperate Housewives and Pretty Little Liars. Seriously, these series is getting more exciting!




I didn't only sat and ate chips to enjoy my holidays, I also tagged along my best buddy Cecil to swim. Thanks to my friend Senor Pablo, we discovered a swimming area at the Stadium. For the price of BND2.00 (60 pesos), I was able to bask under the hiding sun. Yes, it was gloomy that day. It even rained in the morning as Cecil and I prepared to go at the Stadium.

As newbies in the place, we didn't know that there's an ordinary pool and not an olympic size one. Thankfully, with so much curiosity and the will to swim for the next hour, Cecil and I checked on the trail of kids and adults going in a different direction. To our surprise, we found out that there's another pool which suits our amateur skills. Buti na lang, kundi para kaming nag-bath tub lang sa tindi ng lalim ng Olympic size pool, around 1.80 to 2.00 meters in depth.

Wanna dive?
After some hours in the pool, we headed directly to Country Patch. I must say, it is the placed where I had the taste of the best Chicken Chop with mushroom and black pepper sauce. Plus, I sooooo loved the mudpie chocolate cake. As of writing, I'm now craving to get my taste buds on their menu. I will surely comeback for more. By the way, Country Patch has a cozy ambiance paired with their very good customer service. If you're in Brunei, you better check it out!

Mudpie Chocolate Cake!

Apart from the pig out session and lots of sleeping over the holidays, I also "finally" read Bob Ong's latest book entitled "Ang mga Kaibigan ni Mama Susan," my bestfriend Apes recommended me the book last year. And since I have a friend who went back to the Philippines, I asked a favor to get me a copy. And so I got a copy.

Thankfully, I didn't read the book at night. I checked on the pages in one rainy afternoon. As I laid my eyes on the personal journal type of story telling, chills and goosebumps arose. Seriously, buti na lang di ko binasa ang Latin part; this was my shout out after reading the book. Plus, the book's ending was just haunting especially the intentionally made typographical layout. It was just mind-boggling, enough to double the coldness of the rainy holiday and send me some mild nightmares on the same night!

As I read through Bob Ong's pages, a group of black birds with red eyes feast on a piece of bread I placed in the window.  I hope these birds were just after the bread, and not for ME!



That's how I capped off my holidays. Yes, I relaxed to scare myself.

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